In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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