we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
