I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
