i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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