I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
