Sponge bath it is.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
