It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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