I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
