giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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