i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
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