it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
