So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize