Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
