note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
