OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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