watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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