Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
