Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize