When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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