Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
