I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
