good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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