woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
