i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
