we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
