what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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