Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize