People with herpes should wear stickers.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize