I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
