so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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