I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
We're too hungover to prance.
Drunk is not a location!
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
