a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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