She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
