True but thats because hes a fetus.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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