so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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