two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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