I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
