I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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