I feel great
I just peed on a car
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My ass is underappreciated
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize