When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I wish there were birth control emojis
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
