Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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