FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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