dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Randomize
