It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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