I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
time to smoke my breakfast
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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