Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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