So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
