I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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