I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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