I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
