people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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