just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
